Sterling M Fulton Turned Negativity Into Becoming a Life Coach
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Amazon Music | Android
Sterling was on a path of negativity and turned her experience into positivity!
Connect with Sterling Fulton
yourspacetothrive.com
facebook.com/yourspacetothrive
Working for over 20 years as a state program developer, program manager, and a grant manager. Sterling M Fulton in her quest to become a life coach was helped with all of her experience. This allowed her to find a new career path when she was about to find herself unemployed and divorced.
Sterling M Fulton worked with helping health educators to promote their ideas in communities. Becoming a life coach when she realized there might be something she could help people with on a personal level. She works with relationships to find what’s working and amplify that part of the relationship.
Books Mentioned:
Spiritual Divorce: Divorce as a Catalyst for an Extraordinary Life
Love Sense: The Revolutionary New Science of Romantic Relationships
Episode 28
Transcription
1
00:00:13,769 –> 00:00:18,539
this is the dreamers podcast where
dreamers share their stories to inspire
2
00:00:18,539 –> 00:00:19,830
you
3
00:00:19,830 –> 00:00:25,500
now join host Joe Pardo as he interviews
a dreamer who is living their dreams
4
00:00:36,300 –> 00:00:38,59
ok
5
00:00:38,60 –> 00:00:42,380
welcome to the dreamers podcast I’m your
host Joe Pardo and today I’m
6
00:00:42,380 –> 00:00:46,610
interviewing sterling em fulton who is
living her dream through helping others
7
00:00:46,610 –> 00:00:47,450
thrive
8
00:00:47,450 –> 00:00:51,80
welcome to show sterling hi Joe it’s
nice to be here
9
00:00:51,80 –> 00:00:54,440
oh thank you it’s great to have you here
why don’t we get started by giving the
10
00:00:54,440 –> 00:00:56,360
audience some background about yourself
11
00:00:56,360 –> 00:01:01,370
well don’t my journey really started
about three years ago i find i found
12
00:01:01,370 –> 00:01:09,440
myself in this situation in which I was
facing divorce and also job loss and
13
00:01:09,440 –> 00:01:13,610
everything coincided at the same time
and it was really a very scary time for
14
00:01:13,610 –> 00:01:14,240
me
15
00:01:14,240 –> 00:01:23,210
um so I was looking for something that
would open the door for me to build the
16
00:01:23,210 –> 00:01:27,199
life that I wanted to create the future
and I wasn’t really finding it
17
00:01:27,200 –> 00:01:31,190
I wasn’t finding I was fighting a lot of
things that would help me address things
18
00:01:31,190 –> 00:01:38,600
in the past maybe to help me to look at
where I came from but not necessarily to
19
00:01:38,600 –> 00:01:43,699
help me engage in future thinking to
help me to create something that was
20
00:01:43,700 –> 00:01:47,720
meaningful for me in the future and so I
was looking all over for this I just
21
00:01:47,720 –> 00:01:52,700
couldn’t find it in the way in which I
wanted it so Joe you know what i did i
22
00:01:52,700 –> 00:01:56,840
created and that’s my business your
space to thrive
23
00:01:56,840 –> 00:02:04,160
I help people to build their life from
the inside out instead of the outside in
24
00:02:04,160 –> 00:02:09,710
wow that’s wow that’s wonderful that
you’re able to turn something negative
25
00:02:09,710 –> 00:02:12,860
and turn it into something really
positive and not just for yourself but
26
00:02:12,860 –> 00:02:15,650
for others what would you say inspires
you
27
00:02:15,650 –> 00:02:22,760
well what really inspires me is you know
people when they have breakthroughs they
28
00:02:22,760 –> 00:02:27,890
give you that certain look that on that
wow I didn’t know that look
29
00:02:27,890 –> 00:02:33,708
and to me that’s gold and watching
people find themselves are watching
30
00:02:33,709 –> 00:02:37,10
people to really discover something
about themselves that they just didn’t
31
00:02:37,10 –> 00:02:41,690
know for me I think that’s probably the
most inspiration then I add that I could
32
00:02:41,690 –> 00:02:45,79
ask for i mean it just it makes my day
33
00:02:45,80 –> 00:02:48,69
so how did your dream come about I mean
you mentioned that you were
34
00:02:48,69 –> 00:02:52,929
to go through a divorce and all this
negativity was was invading your life
35
00:02:52,930 –> 00:02:56,950
and then all of a sudden it happen for
you and you were able to turn it into
36
00:02:56,950 –> 00:03:00,369
something positive how did that come
about when you know it’s kind of funny
37
00:03:00,370 –> 00:03:05,260
I’ve been working i’m at the time I was
a professional with over 20 years of
38
00:03:05,260 –> 00:03:09,909
program management program development
and grant management experience behind
39
00:03:09,909 –> 00:03:15,99
me I mean I’ve I worked manage a
statewide programs i mean i’ve worked in
40
00:03:15,99 –> 00:03:21,730
all various sectors of helping people
who were health educators to help them
41
00:03:21,730 –> 00:03:28,30
to take their ideas and promote those
ideas within their community so I was
42
00:03:28,30 –> 00:03:33,549
trying to figure out like i said ok so
I’m able to help people who are working
43
00:03:33,549 –> 00:03:37,930
on a statewide level to look at their
ideas and to make them into something
44
00:03:37,930 –> 00:03:41,49
concrete and substantive I can help
people do that
45
00:03:41,49 –> 00:03:46,209
so one morning you know i woke up and i
said ‘what wait a minute you know maybe
46
00:03:46,209 –> 00:03:51,129
there’s something like this you know for
that you can do on a personal level and
47
00:03:51,129 –> 00:03:52,899
I was thinking I said you know
48
00:03:52,900 –> 00:03:57,220
wait a minute I’m not seeing any of this
so when I decided to do is to take all
49
00:03:57,220 –> 00:04:01,239
of that experience I did a lot of
research on what works with
50
00:04:01,239 –> 00:04:06,159
relationships not necessarily what’s
wrong with relationships but works and
51
00:04:06,159 –> 00:04:12,970
I’m i created a six-step system on that
is makes up the foundation of this
52
00:04:12,970 –> 00:04:17,440
business your space to throw it it just
it works I beta tested it I do have a
53
00:04:17,440 –> 00:04:23,620
public health background so I am kind of
a data beak and you know so i used all
54
00:04:23,620 –> 00:04:27,340
of that it and i found out that not only
did it work
55
00:04:27,340 –> 00:04:31,780
it worked beautifully in terms of
helping people to really get clear on
56
00:04:31,780 –> 00:04:36,698
what it is that they want for their
lives how that impacts others and I and
57
00:04:36,699 –> 00:04:39,280
I think that’s one of the things that I
do kind of want to talk about i have
58
00:04:39,280 –> 00:04:42,729
three things that I want to kind of as
we go through this that I want to talk
59
00:04:42,729 –> 00:04:45,969
about that i think would actually be a
benefit to the audience who’s listening
60
00:04:45,969 –> 00:04:50,169
I kind of give them a little bit of the
personal of sterling come touch as we go
61
00:04:50,169 –> 00:04:53,380
through but everything just kind of came
together beautifully
62
00:04:53,380 –> 00:04:57,580
you know the experience that I had the
watching others kind of unfolded to
63
00:04:57,580 –> 00:05:01,688
thrive in their life and so I just used
it to set this foundation
64
00:05:01,689 –> 00:05:07,59
Jen of your space to plan which is which
has been marvelous and helping others to
65
00:05:07,59 –> 00:05:12,99
live their dream so I was your dream
received by your family and your friends
66
00:05:12,99 –> 00:05:14,979
when you’re like hey things are going
wrong
67
00:05:14,979 –> 00:05:19,508
I’m gonna turn into something positive
were they helpful or with a negative
68
00:05:19,509 –> 00:05:20,529
towards it
69
00:05:20,529 –> 00:05:24,909
you know it’s funny at first my family
was not very happy about you know some
70
00:05:24,909 –> 00:05:28,419
of the choices that I made they were not
happy about that and my family is pretty
71
00:05:28,419 –> 00:05:33,279
conservative and divorce just wasn’t
something that happened in my family and
72
00:05:33,279 –> 00:05:38,319
so as a result of that you know they
they were not all that happy with some
73
00:05:38,319 –> 00:05:43,149
of those choices but eventually they
came around and it was really important
74
00:05:43,149 –> 00:05:46,989
to me as I went through this process
that I create the type of relationship
75
00:05:46,989 –> 00:05:52,539
with my ex-husband that was positive and
although i was ending the marriage I was
76
00:05:52,539 –> 00:05:56,438
not ending the family and to me that was
something that was incredibly important
77
00:05:56,439 –> 00:06:00,99
we have two grown children and it was
something that I never wanted my
78
00:06:00,99 –> 00:06:04,179
children to be in a position where they
had to choose they did not ask for the
79
00:06:04,179 –> 00:06:04,779
divorce
80
00:06:04,779 –> 00:06:09,159
they did not ask to be in this situation
so I wanted their experience to be
81
00:06:09,159 –> 00:06:13,479
something that at least years I knew it
was going to be difficult for them but
82
00:06:13,479 –> 00:06:18,68
at least years down the road I didn’t
want them to you know bury their heads
83
00:06:18,69 –> 00:06:21,639
oh my god mom and dad are in the same
room I can’t deal with that to me that
84
00:06:21,639 –> 00:06:26,439
would have been that was horrible and I
knew that my family loved my ex-husband
85
00:06:26,439 –> 00:06:30,189
I didn’t want to break that either
because that’s not fair to them and it’s
86
00:06:30,189 –> 00:06:35,379
not fair to my ex-husband so it was
eventually you know they got over it
87
00:06:35,379 –> 00:06:39,159
uh-huh they got over and they are very
supportive of what I’m doing now
88
00:06:39,159 –> 00:06:43,839
extremely supportive of what I’m doing
now and I was blessed to have an amazing
89
00:06:43,839 –> 00:06:47,979
group of friends who helped me think
through a lot of this they shared with
90
00:06:47,979 –> 00:06:53,19
me initially a book that called
spiritual divorce it’s by debbie Ford
91
00:06:53,19 –> 00:06:58,629
and i read that book and get I give that
book now away to people who are
92
00:06:58,629 –> 00:07:02,649
undergoing the process because taking a
negative situation and turning it into
93
00:07:02,649 –> 00:07:04,119
something positive
94
00:07:04,119 –> 00:07:09,309
it is a possibility so you know I’m i
consider myself very fortunate in the
95
00:07:09,309 –> 00:07:12,560
fact that $PERCENT of the people that
are surrounding me are
96
00:07:12,560 –> 00:07:19,220
positive and uplifting people i call it
in my coaching I call it access to your
97
00:07:19,220 –> 00:07:20,30
inner sanctum
98
00:07:20,30 –> 00:07:24,260
I’m just very positive that the people
who do have access to you know my heart
99
00:07:24,260 –> 00:07:28,250
into my inner sanctum are people that
are uplifting and people that will help
100
00:07:28,250 –> 00:07:30,139
build you up not tear you down
101
00:07:30,139 –> 00:07:33,860
so what steps did you take to get
started as i mentioned before i do have
102
00:07:33,860 –> 00:07:35,120
a background in public health
103
00:07:35,120 –> 00:07:42,230
so one of the first things that i did
was i use my own process my own six-step
104
00:07:42,230 –> 00:07:46,460
process to looking at what i wanted to
create or the outcomes of what it is
105
00:07:46,460 –> 00:07:51,469
that i wanted to create after i use that
I also interviewed a number of people i
106
00:07:51,470 –> 00:07:57,380
did beta testing and when I found after
doing all of that when I got the
107
00:07:57,380 –> 00:08:02,240
information back from the work that I
initially put out there i was able to
108
00:08:02,240 –> 00:08:08,840
refine the product that i now use and
that process took a probably about six
109
00:08:08,840 –> 00:08:14,388
months so again that was the process of
of interviewing people of doing beta
110
00:08:14,389 –> 00:08:19,550
testing with small groups and
individuals taking the feedback using
111
00:08:19,550 –> 00:08:25,729
that feedback to go back and to do
refinements in the process doing all of
112
00:08:25,729 –> 00:08:30,320
that it helped to set the foundation of
what it was that I’m what it was that
113
00:08:30,320 –> 00:08:36,890
I’m creating that i have created now and
what i’m using now is this process to
114
00:08:36,890 –> 00:08:38,750
help others to achieve their dreams
115
00:08:38,750 –> 00:08:42,409
so are there any roadblocks along the
way probably i hate to say it but
116
00:08:42,409 –> 00:08:47,150
sometimes you know in life we can be our
own biggest obstacle and one of the road
117
00:08:47,150 –> 00:08:52,339
blocks that I found that I was doing is
trying to go and it all alone
118
00:08:52,339 –> 00:08:55,910
you know especially in starting my own
business trying to do this without help
119
00:08:55,910 –> 00:09:00,230
from people who have been there before
so the first couple of months I was
120
00:09:00,230 –> 00:09:05,270
trying to do a number of things by
myself and I quickly quickly quickly
121
00:09:05,270 –> 00:09:11,150
quickly found out that was not a good
idea and the course correction and so
122
00:09:11,150 –> 00:09:16,730
you know i surrounded myself with people
who travel the road before and it’s made
123
00:09:16,730 –> 00:09:22,550
a lot easier so making sure that the
people that again you know have access
124
00:09:22,550 –> 00:09:25,349
to you know my heart are people who are
positive and bill
125
00:09:25,350 –> 00:09:29,40
some people who build up that’s just not
in in terms of like personal
126
00:09:29,40 –> 00:09:32,910
relationships but also in terms of
business relationships as well and then
127
00:09:32,910 –> 00:09:37,110
to make sure that I do the same for them
sometimes you know trying to make sure
128
00:09:37,110 –> 00:09:41,520
it’s not a one-way street you know to to
return the blessings to others so I mean
129
00:09:41,520 –> 00:09:44,760
you kind of answered my question about
how you overcame them is there anything
130
00:09:44,760 –> 00:09:46,560
you’d like to add to that though
131
00:09:46,560 –> 00:09:51,30
yeah one of the things i did want to
talk about is that one of the processes
132
00:09:51,30 –> 00:09:56,310
that sets the foundation of what i what
i do when i try to help my clients is to
133
00:09:56,310 –> 00:10:02,489
see is there at the impact of their
actions what that impact has on the
134
00:10:02,490 –> 00:10:06,660
other person who’s receiving it
receiving that what that outcome looks
135
00:10:06,660 –> 00:10:12,839
like for them kind of taking an
empathetic lens on what they do and I
136
00:10:12,840 –> 00:10:17,130
think by using that empathetic lens it’s
a hard thing to do especially kind of
137
00:10:17,130 –> 00:10:21,720
when you’re in the mix of of doing
something it’s by not doing that one
138
00:10:21,720 –> 00:10:26,190
little thing taking the impact that your
actions have on another person into
139
00:10:26,190 –> 00:10:30,540
consideration it really causes a lot of
pain and heartache and relationships
140
00:10:30,540 –> 00:10:35,490
that lack of empathy sometimes is really
beneath the conflicts that exist in our
141
00:10:35,490 –> 00:10:40,920
in our day-to-day experiences that we
have and by using that in pathetic lens
142
00:10:40,920 –> 00:10:45,719
i mean one we increase connections we
increase the comfort that we feel with
143
00:10:45,720 –> 00:10:50,610
people we increase you know he took the
assurance of the trust levels that we
144
00:10:50,610 –> 00:10:55,320
feel with people and you know i’ll give
you a good example about what i mean and
145
00:10:55,320 –> 00:10:59,160
i’m sure maybe I’m hoping that you can
relate to this but if you’re with your
146
00:10:59,160 –> 00:11:02,250
significant other and your significant
other want you to take out the garbage
147
00:11:02,250 –> 00:11:07,470
and you’ve had a hard hard long day and
you just didn’t take out the garbage
148
00:11:07,470 –> 00:11:10,740
well there could be an argument that
ensues and you’re like why are we
149
00:11:10,740 –> 00:11:13,380
arguing over taking out the garbage
150
00:11:13,380 –> 00:11:18,600
well often the argument isn’t on the the
fact about taking out the garbage the
151
00:11:18,600 –> 00:11:23,640
argument is about you know something
much deeper which could be trust or it
152
00:11:23,640 –> 00:11:27,720
could be an issue of you know maybe
feeling a lack of support or something
153
00:11:27,720 –> 00:11:32,400
like that but you’re never able to get
to that deeper core issue because the
154
00:11:32,400 –> 00:11:38,620
the the focuses on the impact of the
impact of the actions towards
155
00:11:38,620 –> 00:11:42,340
that person you know who didn’t get it
done I mean look what you’re doing to me
156
00:11:42,340 –> 00:11:46,870
you didn’t take out the garbage like ask
instead of asking that underlying
157
00:11:46,870 –> 00:11:51,190
message of hey wait a minute let’s step
back and look at their experience and
158
00:11:51,190 –> 00:11:55,150
maybe it could be something that’s
deeper that’s happening and addressing
159
00:11:55,150 –> 00:11:59,50
things for that level so you know that’s
one of the key things that I do talk
160
00:11:59,50 –> 00:12:02,890
about with my clients because I think
living life through that perspective
161
00:12:02,890 –> 00:12:06,970
changes can actually change
relationships and from something that
162
00:12:06,970 –> 00:12:11,110
could be conflict driven to something
that could actually flourish and to be
163
00:12:11,110 –> 00:12:15,550
supportive of you know in the long run
and it all comes back to communication
164
00:12:15,550 –> 00:12:19,209
yes talking when things bother you they
need to be talked about because they’re
165
00:12:19,210 –> 00:12:23,350
not talk about it will come out like you
said over stupid things that should just
166
00:12:23,350 –> 00:12:26,890
be done anyway because they’re the right
thing to do like taking out the trash
167
00:12:27,520 –> 00:12:32,829
well you know and it’s act and not being
afraid of being vulnerable not being
168
00:12:32,830 –> 00:12:37,300
able to afraid to really discuss the
deeper feelings of around something
169
00:12:37,300 –> 00:12:41,979
instead of just uh discussing the
opinion around something more removed
170
00:12:41,980 –> 00:12:45,850
level than that but really kind of
getting in there and talking about the
171
00:12:45,850 –> 00:12:51,430
underlining driving feelings that we all
experience you know the fears that we
172
00:12:51,430 –> 00:12:57,520
have or discomfort that we have being
really open and willing to share those
173
00:12:57,520 –> 00:13:03,69
those feelings with another person and
asking for support when we need it you
174
00:13:03,70 –> 00:13:06,760
know which is not taught to do these
things and you know I mean lately
175
00:13:06,760 –> 00:13:11,530
there’s been a lot of discussions about
it like brené Brown has has talked
176
00:13:11,530 –> 00:13:15,430
about it quite a bit in her books
there’s another dr sue johnson has
177
00:13:15,430 –> 00:13:19,719
talked about it in another a lot of her
books like love sense which is one of
178
00:13:19,720 –> 00:13:23,980
her books that just got released but
these people they’ve they’ve been
179
00:13:23,980 –> 00:13:26,680
talking about vulnerability and opening
up
180
00:13:26,680 –> 00:13:33,10
that’s one of the key factors in helping
relationships become something that
181
00:13:33,10 –> 00:13:38,530
could be like I said conflict vision
conflict driven to something that can
182
00:13:38,530 –> 00:13:44,140
help drive in and to be actually a place
in which you find respite in another
183
00:13:44,140 –> 00:13:48,699
person instead of your kind of running
away from it so its up its possible
184
00:13:48,700 –> 00:13:50,300
ability to do
185
00:13:50,300 –> 00:13:54,229
with another person it takes practice
but it also takes a willingness to kind
186
00:13:54,230 –> 00:13:58,820
of be in touch with who you are a trip
or so has there been any part of your
187
00:13:58,820 –> 00:14:01,700
dream that haven’t quite worked out i’m
just starting
188
00:14:01,700 –> 00:14:05,900
that’s really kind of hard for me to
answer at this point things are going
189
00:14:05,900 –> 00:14:11,329
slower than I’d like but it’s catching
on and doors are opening and it’s the
190
00:14:11,330 –> 00:14:15,980
journey has been wonderful wonderful
actually I’ve got a long-term vision of
191
00:14:15,980 –> 00:14:19,970
my business not just the short term
vision and I’m going through what most
192
00:14:19,970 –> 00:14:24,650
small businesses go through in the
beginning so no i don’t i would say one
193
00:14:24,650 –> 00:14:28,850
interesting thing is that i have and i
encourage others to look at life this
194
00:14:28,850 –> 00:14:33,260
way its kind of when you hit those
roadblocks and challenges is to see the
195
00:14:33,260 –> 00:14:37,760
good in them and learn from them and
then when you get over them you know use
196
00:14:37,760 –> 00:14:42,439
those lessons to set the foundation for
the next steps that you’re going to take
197
00:14:42,440 –> 00:14:47,630
so I do try to live my life from that
level and so don’t typically see some of
198
00:14:47,630 –> 00:14:52,70
the mistakes that I’ve made as a bad
thing necessarily because sometimes it’s
199
00:14:52,70 –> 00:14:55,820
been the best thing that could
potentially ever happened to me you know
200
00:14:55,820 –> 00:14:57,320
be careful what you wish for
201
00:14:57,320 –> 00:15:01,760
I thought your bike so well there’s
always a lesson to be learned
202
00:15:01,760 –> 00:15:06,230
yeah yes absolutely he so if you were
stranded on a deserted on with your
203
00:15:06,230 –> 00:15:09,320
family what three things would you want
to have with you
204
00:15:09,320 –> 00:15:13,400
Oh what three things well let’s see
205
00:15:13,400 –> 00:15:17,900
oh the first thing i would love to have
is my kindle with all the current books
206
00:15:17,900 –> 00:15:23,300
i have on it and like an electricity
supply so I don’t perpetual battery
207
00:15:23,300 –> 00:15:26,780
that’s perpetual battery exactly exactly
208
00:15:26,780 –> 00:15:32,60
the next thing that I wanna head is the
supply of paints and craft supplies i’m
209
00:15:32,60 –> 00:15:37,40
a kind of crafting paint your kind of
person and my dog
210
00:15:37,760 –> 00:15:43,970
so yeah those three things of my kindle
so I could read paint and craft supplies
211
00:15:43,970 –> 00:15:47,870
so i could create things and along with
my family you don’t get my family to
212
00:15:47,870 –> 00:15:55,550
create things with me and then my dog
because you know she’s kinda cool you
213
00:15:55,550 –> 00:15:57,500
know I don’t think of it as a thing
214
00:15:57,500 –> 00:16:01,400
well yeah I mean I would count that as
part of your family if you wanted to if
215
00:16:01,400 –> 00:16:03,240
you have something else in common
216
00:16:03,240 –> 00:16:12,89
there was something that I’ve always
kind of wanted why I think it’s
217
00:16:12,89 –> 00:16:15,870
something I’ve always wanted to do and
if i’m stranded on an island i have lots
218
00:16:15,870 –> 00:16:20,160
of time to learn is I think I take my
guitar i bought a guitar and it’s at
219
00:16:20,160 –> 00:16:23,760
home in the corner and I haven’t started
guitar lessons so i think i would take
220
00:16:23,760 –> 00:16:28,860
that you know that we give me something
new to learn that be exciting you know
221
00:16:28,860 –> 00:16:34,830
so what are your dreams for the future
look like oh my gosh oh my future is
222
00:16:34,830 –> 00:16:40,560
just bright and blissful you know right
now my dreams for the future looks like
223
00:16:40,560 –> 00:16:44,760
this will be a thriving business I it’s
not a business is just going to stay
224
00:16:44,760 –> 00:16:49,620
with me alone on the way of structuring
the business now I want to expand it so
225
00:16:49,620 –> 00:16:53,160
that i can bring others on board to
participate within you know in the
226
00:16:53,160 –> 00:16:57,240
process because i think it you know like
i said i know it works and I’d love to
227
00:16:57,240 –> 00:17:03,540
kind of get out to share with as many
people as possible can i am looking for
228
00:17:03,540 –> 00:17:10,199
enhanced relationships my friends my
family just I mean it’s just an amazing
229
00:17:10,199 –> 00:17:14,429
amazing bright future islands and
clearly see that is there any last
230
00:17:14,429 –> 00:17:17,880
thoughts you’d like to share with the
audience before we go one last thought
231
00:17:17,880 –> 00:17:22,260
that I’d like to share with the audience
is just to ask them to make sure is when
232
00:17:22,260 –> 00:17:27,689
they are doing things that they learn to
identify with their core values are or
233
00:17:27,689 –> 00:17:32,400
what’s really important to them and then
once they identify with those core
234
00:17:32,400 –> 00:17:37,140
values are making sure that they make
decisions from each of those core values
235
00:17:37,140 –> 00:17:41,820
are because it’s so important because
what happens often is sometimes when we
236
00:17:41,820 –> 00:17:47,70
make decisions about things we do so
reactionary and when we do that
237
00:17:47,70 –> 00:17:51,659
sometimes they don’t align with who we
are you know as individuals and i’ll
238
00:17:51,660 –> 00:17:55,770
give you a perfect example of that I’m
not to pick on attorneys but attorneys
239
00:17:55,770 –> 00:18:00,540
are kind of easy to pick on me a double
star joke but I’m you know if you’re an
240
00:18:00,540 –> 00:18:04,559
attorney and one of your core values
family spending lots of time with your
241
00:18:04,559 –> 00:18:05,129
family
242
00:18:05,130 –> 00:18:08,940
one of the things that you don’t want to
do is to join a firm in which it’s
243
00:18:08,940 –> 00:18:12,570
expected that you work eighty to a
hundred hours a week you know doing
244
00:18:12,570 –> 00:18:13,559
billable hours
245
00:18:13,559 –> 00:18:16,168
you don’t want to do that especially
like I said
246
00:18:16,169 –> 00:18:20,279
if your core values family it’s going to
take you away from your family and it’s
247
00:18:20,279 –> 00:18:24,90
gonna eventually cause heartache and
conflict you know whether or not it
248
00:18:24,90 –> 00:18:28,918
causes this harmony within your family
life itself you know I don’t know that
249
00:18:28,919 –> 00:18:32,669
but it could potentially cause
disharmony within yourself you know when
250
00:18:32,669 –> 00:18:37,499
that happens you’re going to do things
to try to heal that disharmony which
251
00:18:37,499 –> 00:18:41,519
often turns out to be kind of negative i
mean some negative ways that we heal you
252
00:18:41,519 –> 00:18:45,869
know we try to heal ourselves but a lot
of this can be avoided if we make
253
00:18:45,869 –> 00:18:51,899
decisions that come from our core values
so if we know what our core values are
254
00:18:51,899 –> 00:18:57,418
if we make decisions based upon those
core values and we hold fast to those i
255
00:18:57,419 –> 00:19:01,379
think those those things and we also
teach our children to do that as well I
256
00:19:01,379 –> 00:19:06,629
just think those it’s anything it’s an
invaluable thing to do and on my website
257
00:19:06,629 –> 00:19:17,189
which is www.hyken.com i have up a core
values like lesson with your listeners
258
00:19:17,190 –> 00:19:21,419
can do they can just go in in an access
that core values lesson
259
00:19:21,419 –> 00:19:26,759
awesome i would like to try that out
myself to sue the sea where I’ll and so
260
00:19:26,759 –> 00:19:30,659
is there any other facebook or other
websites you’d like the plug
261
00:19:30,659 –> 00:19:37,950
yeah absolutely the business is your
space to thrive so the website is www .
262
00:19:37,950 –> 00:19:40,679
your space to thrive . com
263
00:19:40,679 –> 00:19:47,249
i am also on facebook so please like me
on facebook what I’ve done is a monthly
264
00:19:47,249 –> 00:19:52,80
on facebook i have campaigns that are
running at a certain time so if you kind
265
00:19:52,80 –> 00:19:55,529
of go through your feet or you can
actually go to the your space to thrive
266
00:19:55,529 –> 00:19:59,970
facebook page i have a lot of articles
that are posted on their about
267
00:19:59,970 –> 00:20:05,789
particular topics so back in june i have
articles about fathers day I’ve had the
268
00:20:05,789 –> 00:20:10,289
whole month of june as a relationship
you know cuz June is the month of love
269
00:20:10,289 –> 00:20:13,799
so I have articles about how to
strengthen your relationships you know
270
00:20:13,799 –> 00:20:18,389
from some of the top experts like dr.
sue johnson and dr. John Gottman again
271
00:20:18,389 –> 00:20:23,609
people who look at building and creating
not necessarily looking at the past so
272
00:20:23,609 –> 00:20:27,449
you know there’s a lot of value within
that I’m on linked in
273
00:20:27,450 –> 00:20:32,700
and on twitter as well the linkedin site
is under me sterling in fulton so you
274
00:20:32,700 –> 00:20:36,269
can get to know a little bit about my
background and what I bring into the
275
00:20:36,269 –> 00:20:40,559
process through that so yes so please
come visit my website have a free gift
276
00:20:40,559 –> 00:20:45,480
that I offered through my website and
it’s an e-book called three secrets to
277
00:20:45,480 –> 00:20:50,519
helping you thrive in the life of your
dreams you know access that and and get
278
00:20:50,519 –> 00:20:55,49
that free book along with it comes like
discussion cards and the conversation
279
00:20:55,49 –> 00:21:00,90
starter cards which our discussion cards
as well as a weekly emails that you
280
00:21:00,90 –> 00:21:03,629
receive about inspirational positive and
positive thoughts
281
00:21:04,230 –> 00:21:09,179
so you know I like giving away a lot of
value to people and because i think it’s
282
00:21:09,179 –> 00:21:14,70
just love sharing hoping your listeners
will do that and get a lot from it i
283
00:21:14,70 –> 00:21:15,269
hope so too
284
00:21:15,269 –> 00:21:18,120
well thank you so much for coming on the
show starring I really appreciate it
285
00:21:18,120 –> 00:21:22,590
thank you for having me thank you for
having me i just love the idea of
286
00:21:22,590 –> 00:21:28,620
helping people to see their dreams and
inspiring people to you know kind of
287
00:21:28,620 –> 00:21:33,779
just go for it you know building their
life from the inside out and not the
288
00:21:33,779 –> 00:21:36,809
outside it’s not easy but somebody’s got
to do it
289
00:21:37,679 –> 00:21:42,750
take care thank you thank you for
joining us for this episode of the
290
00:21:42,750 –> 00:21:44,890
dreamers podcast
291
00:21:44,890 –> 00:21:50,770
follow us on twitter and dreamers
podcast join us on facebook at
292
00:21:50,770 –> 00:21:53,800
facebook.com slash dreamers podcast
293
00:21:54,710 –> 00:21:58,880
if you or someone you know would like to
be a guest on the dreamers podcast
294
00:21:58,880 –> 00:22:06,919
please send an email to j and j parr .
co this podcast is copyright 2014 by j
295
00:22:06,919 –> 00:22:09,919
parr . comb
296
00:22:11,49 –> 00:22:18,879
yeah
